DAY 2

Yesterday, I was feeling particularly good-- like I could take on the world. And I left work late (again, so what's new)-- mainly because my favorite guy is leaving the company in a couple weeks and I am sad sad sad that I won't be able to share anymore ridiculous stories with him while on the way out the door.

Ahh. Not quite office boyfriend. Goodbye!

But I got home at 7:15 and was at the gym at 7:30, ready for my first Club Strength class. You know, the one where you lift weights and put them down and up again, with bars and barbells and "8 more, seven-- down down, six-- down down," etc etc. I took that class. Since I had no idea what I was doing, I asked a girl in line "will you be my swim buddy?" and she said yes!

I am that cool!

She helped me get set up, helped with the weights, smiled at appropriate times when I was farting and lunging and squatting my way through the course. Oh yes, I totally tooted at least three times. When we went into cat pose, I aimed my keister towards the back of the room, so at least no one would pass out from the fumes. I can't help it people, I fart, and there is no holding it back.

At the end of the class I told the instructor it was my first class like that-- she was surprised-- "You kept up really well. Good job, I'll see you next week." Yay me. Although, I totally did the modified version of everything, but to be honest, I didn't care. I made it through a whole class and didn't feel like the dumb one in the back.

Walking home my legs felt like jello, my body already started to break down, and honestly I feel like I have to flu. But it's just the lack of muscle tone. It'll get better.

I woke up at 4:30 am with a raging headache and parched for water. I fell back asleep for a couple hours, but not enough to feel completely rested. And I feel like a tight rubber band. Remember having braces and getting the headgear or the bands tightened? That's what my whole body feels like.

Laying in bed between 4:30 and 7:00, I realized Maddie is gone. I've put her down somewhere, because instead of feeling sad all the time, I am angry and always feel like I am missing something. I am not sure if she will come back, but energetically, I can't feel her face, I can't feel her weight around my middle. I do miss that protection. Wherever you are, goodnight pretty girl!