The Little Engine That Could

Saturday, November 20, 2010

Life changed


Yup, married.

10.30.10 in a beautiful church in Long Island, we said I do to each other and to living our lives together. Forever.

I realize so many things along the way.... who I am vs. who I was. I finally feel like I am living the life I was meant to live. I am healthy, I am happy (because, c'mon people, it's a choice), I am employed (full time as of June 1), and my family grew all in one day-- just by saying I do, I now have 34 new family members with brothers, sisters, neices and nephews.

The wedding was glorious. Every day should be so smooth.

One thing I realized is how important it is to blog. TO let people in on my life. For the two years I was consistent with writing, when I was going through the weight loss and the start of a new life, I was connected. I was able to be open and honest with everything that was going on. Now, I like to keep the truly special moments private. Between me and my beloved. I want the connection to him, but realize that others may need to know how to transition from "omigod I am losing weight/hair/ sizes/ friends" to "this tool is awesome and sometimes I use it for evil and not good".

People need to know about what happens year 3-7, when life happens and isn't all about the weightloss/ plastic surgery/ nasty protein shakes/ gym routines. When life takes on a new path, with new jobs, new living arrangements, new additions (god willing) and new habits.

I haven't quite decided what to do. This blog will always stay up. For newer folks, look back in June of 2007 and then go forward. That is the start of the journey, mind and body becoming more svelte. All the worries. All the questions. All the stuff that goes along with being a patient with no patience. Then see how life changes. Because life does come back, and you realize that you have had a great gift bestowed on you to make changes that will impact the rest of your life. But it happens slower, more fluid.

I'll post again. I'll write again, and will invite you along for the journey. It might not be for a while, and I am not entirely certain how, but I know I want to capture all that is rattling around in my brain.

I've missed you Big Girl, Big City. You were a very good friend and I've abandoned you. Although, still a big girl, I also realize I am much more than that. Big city, soon to leave but always close by. Thank you for being me, but I've come to realize you too were a persona. The me that is real underneath it all is quite sensitive, calm and is very very happy to not be travelling the world. Who loves coming home, cooking dinner, and spending the evening just getting house stuff done. Who is in love with someone who loves her more than she ever thought possible. Who is thinking of a future that is somewhat pickett fence crossed with intellectual pursuits.

I've also missed my connection to the community. My new job hasn't allowed for much surfing, so I've just recently started looking at old friends sites. I've always been a bit of a lurker...... so watch out.