Beef--Unless it's ground, it isn't the best idea for me. After one little piece (okay it was bigger than little, but enough for a regular bite) and not enough chewing, I spent 15 minutes in the bathroom trying to puke it out. Retching over the bowl trying to think of every gross thing that would have me dry heave to maybe, perhaps get the alien out of my tummy, spitting out foam and goo and not the alien stuck just beyond my reach. Then I stuck my finger down my throat, and in three tries, up it came. And then went I did felt like a champion.
Except when I looked at my face. Red face, bloodshot around my eyes, watery eyes, makeup streaming down my face. Not fucking cute at all.
I don't have a regular stomach. Why would I take regular bites?
So beef, steak, strips, cubes-- not a good idea.
I'm going to fess up, so far (and it's only Tuesday) I have had three bags of Doritos, a bag of popcorn, 2 bags of peanut butter M&Ms and a twix bar. And that's just at work. At home I have eaten two very delicious chocolate bars and the rest, stayed on plan. WHAT THE FUCK????
Does anyone else want to fess up and call this shit complete? How can we onliners support each other as a community? I need support, and although I love the comments, I need like a daily written support that would have me fess up be in action, be on plan. A place I knew I could write in and someone would respond. I am hesistant to use OH because, well, freakzoids sometimes show up there (doesn't anyone ever pass pysch evals?) and I don't want a lot of other people's agenda (God. No God. Mexico. Plastics. No Plastics. Insurance Woes. Opinions about politics. Lack of opinions about politics. My new haircut. Etc).
If I started a Yahoo group that was aimed at WLS patients or pre-patients (or those that love WLS patients that want to declare a goal and be accountable) with the idea that it is all about keeping each other accountable in our journey (like food plans, exercise, creating goals and maintaining them) who would to join? Would it be like throwing a party and no one comes? What about all those folks that aren't bloggers but surf. Would they join?
Hmmm. I need something. I don't care that most of us live hours away from each other, but it would be really nice to head to an OA meeting with someone who knows me.....
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6 comments:
I would definitely participate in a group like you described. I had my RNY in June of 2006. I am thinking this would be a good way of keeping up with some WLS persons who were at the same time frame as I.
And, oh yes, I agree about the freakzoids at OH. I don't post there much at all.
Julie
Yes, I would participate in the type of group you described. It would be a good way of being in touch with WLS people who were a little further out. I had my RNY in June of 2006.
I agree with not going to OH for this. There are alot of so called 'freakzoids' there!! I don't ever post there much, but some of it is entertaining to read.
Julie
Hey there
I just found your blog. I am in New Zealand and I had my RNY in Nov 2007.
I too can eat chippies and chocolate in reasonable quantities and not seem to have too many issues.
Although I am forunate that I can eat most meats as well, I still struggle with some normal foods.
The idea of a WLS support group is fantastic.
Also have you been to renewed reflections? They seem to have a good network of people in the US. Unfortuantely for me it makes it a bit harder being in New Zealand.
I hear you.
Being able to tell the truth is very rare.
Where can you do it but your own space?
I would participate.
I'd be part of your Yahoo group, girlfriend. Or if you want to just talk on the phone, I'm down for that too.
I know what you mean about OH - I stopped going there about a year ago and I don't miss it at all.
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