3 month stall

I've been at a three month stall. About the same 2-5 pounds for the last three months.

What does that mean?

So here's what I am doing that I am not proud of.

1) Smoking on and off. Quitting again today.
2) Eating and drinking together. A little water washes down the food.
3) Not drinking enough water when I think I am hungry. I eat instead.
4) Sitting in front of the TV or computer while eating. Not paying attention to my meals. Not taking a meal as an opportunity to nourish, rather as an opportunity to zone out.
5) Eating more than 3 meals a day. Yup, grazing.
6) Alcohol. With the conferences, a drink or five is a good idea.
7) Cookies. Sugar. Candy. I keep thinking I'll dump on them, and yet, no, no I don't.
8) Talking about working out. Thinking about working out. Not working out.
9) Making choices about food based on "what I like" vs. what I need. I need protein. I need veggies. I don't need lemon tarts.
10) Going in late to work. I can tell when I am out of integrity when I keep showing up later and later.
11) Coffee. Buckets of it. With milk. And sugar (or splenda if available).
12) Bread. With cheese, with sausage, with meat with fruit.
13) Not moving enough. Too much couch time.

Most of all, I am not being gentle and kind to myself. At all.

So the three month stall I will call complete. From today forward, I am taking on the last bit of weightloss anew. Like this is the weight I started at, and now I want to get to a size 10 in jeans/ pants and a size medium in tops. And I will lose another 70 pounds by June of next year. That gives me 9 months to get going, a little under 10 pounds a month. By June 2009, I will have run a 10K. Run. Not walk, but run.

Here's what I will do to make that happen:
1) Water first. Then 1/2 hour later, meals.
2) All my vitamins, every day.
3) Drink water 1 hour after meals to a total of 64 oz a day.
4) Gym time 4 days a week. Monday, Wednesday, Friday and once on the weekend. 5 K walk on the weekend to running.
5) Re-convene my support team. This includes therapist, nutritionist, and fellow WLS ladies. Including friends that will support me by working out, doing active things together, and creating healthy lifestyles.
6) Enroll the boyfriend into working out with me. Have him join the gym with me by November.
7) Plan for 8 hours of sleep every night.
8) No eating after 8pm, if that is dinner time.
9) Get to work by 8:30 every morning. No emails until lunchtime, and then home by 6pm. Gym at 6:30 (except Wednesdays and Fridays-- will do the gym at 6:30am)
10) Write every day.

One of the things I notice is that I go missing, and don't have a voice. I skip out on keeping the journal, which has me not remember exactly when or what I have done. I call that complete as well.

Life is actually good right now. My clothes are getting bigger, I think I am getting smaller. I have started a new routine that could have my stall be medical, but I will bust through that. The boyfriend and I are happy, and talking about the when he will move in. It's kinda huge and scary-- because he's never lived anywhere but with his family, and I've never shared a place with someone I love. Lots of stuff to move around.

Okay, complete. And start again.