In California, feeling great. And a little vulnerable because I am feeling little like a turtle without my shell. Because sometimes I don't know how to be with mistakes.
Note: Today was a perfect day. I woke up rested, went to lunch with A. after long conversations and whatnot, then Kohl's (I fit into an xl jacket. I have no idea who I am.). On the way back to her house, I need my coffee fix.
We pull into the coffe place. Literally. I gave them a drive thru. Because as I was slowing, my car sped up and blammo, into the window. Yes mom, people dove for cover.
I am shaken. I am not hurt in anyway, except my ego. I am already feeling very delicate and prickly and this happens and I want to scream out why me and bob and weep in a corner and just wake up tomorrow and hope it was all some fucked up Dallas type dream.
But it's not. No one's hurt. I am shaken and stirred however I am not hurt. Emotioanlly fragile like a puffer flower. Without my shell.
A. is taking care of me. We watched Intervention and I had Mexican for dinner. Soon I will be curled up with a kitty on my lap and will go to bed after a nice long bath and tuck myself in and go get back into the drive thru car tomorrow to head back to the beach and then sit on a couch bobing and weaving and thinking and eventually come back to NYC and not drive for a while.
Everything will be okay. Everything will be okay. Everyone please tell me everything will be okay. Because right now I feel like I can't breathe and feel so stupid and sad and everything.
Ahh. Happy vacation.
The Little Engine That Could
About Me
- Kim
- Loud. Pushy at times, shy at others. I wear loud clothes. You can't miss me, and I am either "i love her" or "I hate her". I do not live in in-betweens. My clothes are less loud these days. I think, so am I. Further update: underneath it all, a kinder gentler smaller big girl. Still in big city.
Me now
Full Length Me Now
Me Travelling
Me at the Beginning
Me, according to Cousin
4 comments:
It's not a vacation until something crazy happens! And, really, in CA we have so many bad drivers they will have forgotten about you before the window guy is done with the repairs! I am glad to hear that you are OK, that is what is really important!
(((hugs)))
Oh noes! But it sounds like you have a good recovery plan. Hey, where in California are you? Southernish?
KIM!! Those things are to be left to ME to do. I'm sorry you broke the coffee shop. You're okay and there's lots of insurance for these things.
My friend - you will be more than OK - I promise!!! You were just a girl, enjoying Elton on the radio, windows down, cool breeze in your hair, wanting a coffee fix. Scary things happen for no apparent reason, however soon it will be a distant 'funny' memory (in time you will laugh!). Not one hair on anyone's head was hurt, your family and friends adore you.....hell, even the starbucks manager adored you - literally how cool was she!! This area of Cali already misses you. Please don't feel sad or stupid...lordy, everyone does silly things or has accidents. This is not the first time, and it won't be the last time mistakes are made....it is learning to love ourself and our experiences. Believe me A is loving you more now because you were so strong and brave. You are the best! Be proud of yourself because I know I am!!!! :)
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